immortal beloved.

that is probaly one of the sadest movie i have ever seen in my life.
but at the same time one of the most beautiful.
ive been so emotional lately. its kinda lame.
but nevertheless i dont think ive ever been this emotional.
very strange.
on friday it was a pretty good day.
i went to school roasted and after went to finish up some service hours at a church banquet.
in church there is so many fake catholic people.
really there are. but i cant be hypocritical becasue the extent of my faith is praying at night sometimes.
im pretty agnostic. ive tried to be more holy. but i just cant.
after being worked like a slave cutting garlic bread and checking ovens,
i was visited by lauren,scott,nick&trisha which was a nice surprize because i swear a little more and i was gona drown myslef in the choclate fountain. if it wasnt already occupied by joe.
its really hard not knowing if the person could be with the other. while your stuck thinking of them.
i think im losing. i really am.
as much as i dont want to. i feel its the best for my well being.
to take this much hurt is really not good. and i cant take much more.
that means i must act like if im over it.
its killing me. not literrally but gosh its horrible.
i had a chance to be a bit happier. i really wish i had taken it before.
why cant all love stories end like garden state.