20090318

the road less traveled.

is just another road. no difference.
and im fine with that, i never thought different.
or maybe i didnt care.
its so hard to differentiate my apathy for acceptance.
do not care about life? or am i just letting go?
or has it always been this way.

my family thinks of me as the free spirited one and the one that essentially got away.
but im not, im rooted. i hate being in one place for too long and i just want to fly to run to swim to walk to roll if i have to. but i cant i just cant. its that feelin, when you were little and you spin yourself around and you fall on the floor. you stopped and your laying on the grass but the world keeps spinning and even if you close your eyes, you still feel like your spinning.

theres not much i can do, i cant just leave things behind and just visit anybody i want.
i dont want to do anythint i just want to lump and lump and lump.
smells like chinese food outside my window and i want to close it,
but i cant because its too hot inside my room.
i cant stop eating, i literally cant.
maybe its this slump im going through and i just want to eat away my troubles or something.
so much to do
so much to
so much
so

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