i'm (not) okay.

seventeen and half-alive.

theres so many thoughts and repeating lyrics going through my head. so many thoughts, i wish i could put them all in a net,run to desert around me and set them free.

i should take in the scenary, this is the kind of scenary that kids like me fall in love to. the cactus on the ground, the vast pale dirt, a tumbleweed here and there and colors so vivid and bright it looks as if the sky was on fire.

there isnt enought time. we need to leave it all behind. i know youre right for me, i know it, do you? is this a phase, my mind pulls me left and my heart pulls me right. nothing today will matter tomorrow. hundreds of miles away and your as close as my breath in the cold air.

i can see the future now. the day comes, we whisper goodbye and false promise reunions in the summer. the months pass, you travel off and i make my life somewhere. years pass and im ready to leave life here with a promising smile and a promise on a new life. bump into you somwhere near home, a store shelf perhaps. i greet you, your face the same but you're aged i can tell. experience wraps your body, pulling me in. we sit for a talk on what we have accomplished. while you talk of life up north, i remember the love i had in my heart, and for a while it seeps through like and oil leak, but i suck it up. why did i not tell you, would it have mattered? should i tell you now after all this time?

we part our ways,agree to communicate and remember those days.

the definition of bittersweet.